Pfc. Dustin Gross

I started this blog so that I could share the lessons, laughs, and adventures that I have while raising my three sons.  Today was one of those "lessons" kind of days.  Today in our small community, we brought home a true hero who had given his life for this country that we live in. Today, we lined the streets by the thousands with flags in hand and watched as the casket of a 19 year old soldier passed by on its way to the the funeral home where thousands more will visit and give condolences to the family of Dustin Gross.
My wife and I took our kids out of school early so that they could be apart of the tribute to this man and his ultimate sacrifice that he gave. This was one of those moments that I wish that my sons would never have to see but knew that it's important for them to realize that there are people out there that are mean and evil and want to do us harm. But more importantly, I wanted my sons to witness for themselves that there are good, kind, courageous  people that will stand in between us and the enemy, and without regards for themselves tell that evil that they can go only so far. Pfc Gross was one of those people.
I personally didn't know Dustin, but as I stood road side waiting for the processional to come by, I looked around and noticed that I knew his shop teacher from high school. I knew the lady at the county clerks office that had given him his drivers licences. I knew the girl that worked the drive-thru at the local hamburger joint. I realized that Dustin and I had never met but he had impacted all those people around him. That those people that I pass everyday with smiles and small talk, have been impacted by this young man in some form or fashion and that I too have been touched by this young man as well. He has left a small part of himself with each person he came in contact with. I'm sure his sense of humor, or encouraging words to these people will now forever be remembered and that these people are forever changed because of the person he was. And in that same way I am changed too by this young man and his life of service that he lived. And THATS why I took my kids to pay respect to this young man. They need to know that their lives are far more reaching than what they can ever imagine. That their actions will help shape and mold way more people than they think, and that their attitudes and words have lasting repercussions than just the people they speaking with at the time. We all need to learn this lesson.
To me that's what makes this town of ours so very, very special because whether we personally know each other or not, we have in some ways added to or taken away from each others day to day life.
As the motorcade drove by there was a hushed silence. But the voice of Pfc Dustin Gross will be forever heard  in the city of Mt. Sterling.

Where are the dreadlocks?

I've come to realize lately that the decisions I make now are like drops in a pond and they not only effect my little "ring" but go out and reach many generations far from the initial "drop". With this in mind my wife came to me several months ago and asked, "What do you think about homeschooling our boys?" Now, I don't know what came to your mind just now, but the first thing that I thought of was "Oh no! Our kids are going to be wearing homemade clothes and sporting the salad bowl haircuts!   I'm not one to shoot down anyone's ideas and especially Heather's. (I do knows which side my bread is buttered if you know what mean.) So I listened and watch for several months as she researches and studied, and all the while I'm watching to see how far this is going to go. Well...last weekend we spent 2 days at the National Home School Convention. (Obviously this has gone farther than I had suspected.) Anyway, while sitting in seminar after seminar with titles such as The Classical Education Style, Latin for Young Ones and The Dumbing Down of  America's Kids , I found myself amazed at how "normal" everyone was. In fact I was out and out disappointed of the lack of dread lock sporting, non deodorant wearing  hippies that I was counting on in case I wasn't on board with this idea. And where was young Jedediah and Luther Amish-stien that I could point out and say "There ya go honey, hitch up the wagon cause that's what we're going to be raising."What has replaced them are well behaved kids with genuinely concerned parents that have had enough of the failing education system. Now, let me make a disclaimer here. I'm by no means coming down on the teachers because, Lord knows they are doing their best with what they've got. When you have 30 kids in one room and more than likely a couple of those may have some type of learning/behavior disorder it REALLY makes it hard for that one teacher to properly educate the whole. Heck, just going to Walmart and ending up in line with some of these kids is enough for me to jack slap the parents! But that's for another post.
Annnnyway, like I was saying. The decisions you make as a parent affect not just your kids, but your whole generational blood line. So long story short (er). Heather and I are just trying to do our best so that our three minions wont spend the majority of their adulthood on the psychiatrist's couch. We want them to have not just an education but a love for learning and a passion for wisdom. And more than anything we want them to become the men that God has created them to be and fulfill the purpose He has put on their lives.  As for the home school decision, I'm still mulling it over but I have gone from skeptic, to non-bias objective, to informed. Now, if you see me out and Heather has the dreads flowing and the boys are sporting the salad bowl hair cut, just steer clear cause the deodorant may also be a little lacking.

Pets part 2

Well, for those that read Pets part 1, or knows our luck with pets personally let me start by saying that this is NOT a funeral notice. Duke is alive and......well....lets just get to the story.

For those that don't know us, we live just outside Mt. Sterling Kentucky in a beautiful neighborhood with WAY to many rules. Not that all rules are bad, but I'm a huge fan of living and let live. As long as you're not making a nuclear bomb next door or running a brothel, hey, it's your piece of dirt have at it. Not everyone feels the same way. For example, our subdivision with 17 houses is literally in the middle of acres and acres of farm land and we have a leash law. Maybe I'm old school, but when I grew up, if there was a mean dog in the neighbor hood, you rode your bike faster past his house and never, EVER, went into his yard after a miss hit baseball! You didn't expect a maximum security wireless lock-down facility for the animal, you just understood that if you ever saw the dog not to mess with it and for God sake, don't make eye contact! Besides that, our dog Duke is a licker, not a biter, dumb but lovable. In other words, he fits in well here.
    Along with our leash law we also have a "no fence" law.(Did I mention there are a lot of rules?) With the combination of these two rules it leaves you with a choice of becoming a cat person...(not a chance!) or have a tiny ankle eater that barks incisively at every mouse fart and shadow movement.  We decided on making an option number 3.  The Mac-Daddy, keep you pet under wraps, underground fence!
     This is a product that I found on the internet with a wonderful commercial of a family playing in the yard of their two story Colonial style home with their beloved golden retriever and I'm thinking, "Heck yeah, that could be us!" By the way, I'm an infomercial junkie. If you want to sell this ol'boy a frying pan with a tilling attachment that removes stains from your carpet and runs off lawn clippings, all you gotta do is put it in front of a Colonial House and tell me about free shipping and you've got your self a customer!  Well, after slapping down the credit card and spending a Saturday laying high voltage wire around the perimeter of our house, which, sadly, still looked like the brick ranch style and not the Colonial.  I grab the "training video" and pop it in for some advice on how to keep our man eating beast of a dog confined with in the newly laid highly charged underground fence. Once again, I see the dream home with the all the trimmings but this time I learn how to work with Duke by taking his favorite treats and his fondest toy out to play in the yard and introduce him to his "new" surroundings. According to the nice lady on the video, my dog will feel a mild corrective vibration and will relate the discomfort to the flagged area where the fence is, causing him to stay with in confines and eventually have free reign of our yard. Simple, right? Well, off we go with bacon bits in hand and his toy skunk he has had since he came to live with us.  As we were playing, I was constantly reassuring him with praise AND bacon! Life was good....WE could have been making the infomercial! However, it was time to get a little closer to the fence for his 1st encounter.  As I tossed his toy up to the flag, Duke runs up to it and I hear this ZZZZZZZAP!!! At which point Duke runs full steam....NOT towards me, but AWAY from me through the neighborhood yelping like...well, like he'd been SHOCKED. After pulling him out from under the neighbor's bush down the street we come back into our yard and try another round. However, Duke is no longer the happy little Labrodoodle that wants to lick your face off. What I have now is this nervous, twitching fur ball that no longer will play with his stuffed animal and refuses to eat bacon! SERIOUSLY?, What dog won't eat bacon?!! I put a small piece next to his mouth and he clinches his teeth and tightens his lips so that you can't even force it in his mouth! And the toy? Well, now when you show it to him he drops his head and looks the other way! Poor Duke.
   Well long story short, that was a week or so ago, and he has finally has come to grasps with the idea of staying in the yard and things are looking up. He now will nibble a small piece of bacon, however he's still leery about that mean old toy that "bit" him.  (I told you he fits in well here.)

Road Trip...WITH KIDS!!

One of my favorite things in the world is a road trip. The open road, the lack of a schedule, it really gives you a sense of freedom.  Well...that was before kids. Now a trip to the grocery store is an all out assault on my sanity!  I'm serious! When we pop in on friends and family for a visit it's like a swat team of noise and toys.  If you've never seen the Cockrell circus up close and personal let me give you a little sample of how we "roll".
    This past summer, my cousin and his wife invited us to go out on their boat down at Lake Cumberland. (About an hour and a half drive for us.) Heather and I accept the invite with more than just a little hesitation knowing that, 1) Driving with our kids is like living in a Twilight episode where time stand stills even though your traveling down the interstate. And 2) My cousin's boat is waaaaay too nice for the "shock and awe" treatment that comes along when the 3 monkeys are really excited...like going on a boat!  Anyway, off we go to make some memories, and admittedly things are going well for the 1st hour. However, as we stopped for our 3rd (yes 3rd pee break) reality started to kick in and here is how it all went down.
    As the van door opens at the gas station, 2 out of 3 are shoe-less and doing the pee dance barefooted in the parking lot while Heather and I dig through the garbage truck that once was our van trying to find the missing sneakers. (Did I mention we are just an hour into it?) Ok, shoes on we bust through the door because, good Lord we've not peed in over 20 minutes and bladers are going to start exploding at any time. I take the twins into the men's room where to EVERYONE'S surprise stands a naked homeless man taking a sponge bath out of the sink. "DADDY! why is that guy..." SHHHHH! Get in the stall,Get in the stall,Get in the stall....As I shove all 3 of us into a one person stall! Now, as I stand there having my shoes hosed down by distracted and very LOUD whisperers of my innocent 7 year olds, I'm trying to think of how we can get out of there with minimal contact with what the kids have now labeled, "Super Naked Man, and his power stink". Well, as luck would have it, the boys and I noticed at the same time a twenty dollar bill drying out over the toilet paper holder. They think they've hit the lottery but I realize that "avoiding" the homeless man is off the table and a "teachable moment" has arisen. Thankfully, as we handed the money back to the guy he had dressed himself and was ever so great-full to the boys for their honesty.
  Back from the bathroom, we decide to grab a drink and from the other side of the store I hear Heather whisper through gritted teeth, "Noah, if you don't straighten up I'm going to wear you out right here and now!" (I told you the wheels came off).
 Anyway, as we all put our goodies on the counter and as the girl starts to ring  us up, the boys notice what each of them have picked out and start what I refer to as shell game of indecision.  It's played by taking one candy up to the counter only to take it back and replacing it with gum and taking the gum back for a sucker all the while yelling, "I want what Scout has, no I want something different, I don't want this, I want what Asher has, followed by NOAH KEEPS COPYING ME!" And if I'm lying about this next part, may I be struck by lighting. The girl quits ringing me up, looks me straight in the eye, motions to the door and says, "just take what you need".  Oooooh no lady, you can't deter this type of chaos that easy! I throw out ten dollars and tell her if that doesn't cover our bill I'll go the garbage truck for more! Needless to say, she was good with that and relieved that this nightmare encounter was almost over....almost.
   We pile back into the van and buckle everyone up as Heather and I look around at the destruction. We see the faces of all the other patrons with looks of bewilderment and smirks and I think to myself...how rude. Well, when they started to point and yell, "YOUR DRINKS ARE ON YOUR ROOF!!!" I realized, they aren't rude....they are just making sure we don't have to come back in the store for round number 2!
  So, if you ever see me white knuckled cruising down the interstate going just a little more than just a little over the speed limit....cut me some slack and get out of my way! I'm on a mission people, I'm making road trip memories with my kids....or just going to the store.

Pets

Pets
  In our neighborhood the Cockrell House  has become affectionately known as the "Green Mile" for pets. Not that we don't love or take care of all God's  creatures, we just have come to grips that it is our role to help them in their transition from this world to the next. To date we have had a hamster, a turtle, a crab, a calf, 5 fish, and as of today 1 stay of exiquiston execution for Duke our 6th attempt at a family dog. Needless to say, he's a nervous animal that longs for human contact. 


  Our latest victim came in the form of Bubbles,one of three fish we purchased as a reward for good behavior for our three sons. As we searched the local pet store for prey, the pet store "dude" assured us that the Oscar fish was virtually indestructible and would die of old age well after the boys go off for college. That was 2 weeks and 1 day ago. As we sat at the dinner table tonight, Asher, the oldest twin asked my wife, "Mommy, what did you do with my fish today?" With this question, a hush fell on what was normally the loudest part of our day. I break the now deafening silence with a booming "everyone  wait here and I'll go check on it," spoken as if I were going to protect them from the unknown forces of evil. Sure enough, we have three little bowls  and only 2 fish. I look around thinking the little sucker has dug a tunnel and escaped only to realize there is a small chair out of place. It has magically scooted incredibly close to the counter where the bowls were placed on the counter top. As I sit back down at the table, my wife looks at me and knows immediately that we have a funeral to plan. To my right sits the twins  anxiously waiting to hear the report from the war front. Obviously, they have no knowledge that death has once again struck, and are  therefore are cleared from questioning. However, straight across from me sits the three year old. I see that his shirt sleeves are wet, something that went unnoticed earlier. He has also developed a sever case of attention defect disease and can no longer keep his eyes FOCUSED on me. "Noah. Have you been playing with Asher's fish," I ask. "Ummm, just a little," he states still shifting his eyes. "Well, where is it Noah? Where have you put him," I continue. "Well dad, I'm not sure" "Not sure" was not the answer I was looking for. "Noah, tell dad what happened to Asher's fish and you won't get into any more trouble than you already are," I say while realizing that more than likely he will. "Well dad, Duke and I wanted to play with the fish but when I picked him out of the bowl he wiggled." "Wiggled?! well son where is he now?," I ask. "Daddy, when he wiggled, I dropped him on the floor and Duke though it was his turn to play with him and I haven't seen him since....you better ask Duke, he might know now."
  Needless to say that with this information tears were shed by Asher then by Noah who had to give his fish to his brother as punishment for killing the other one. As with many nights around our dinner table, we tend to have BIG portions of life lessons and cold leftovers. Our table is small, but what a joy it is to sit down with family each night and listen and learn about each other about our hopes and dreams, our wishes and goals, and yes, our occasional fish killing story.